• "Ask about our specials!" sez room svc answering machine. "What are your specials?" I ask. "We have no specials" sez room service. #whut #dc #
• Capitol style. http://t.co/BQ6Iztex #
• In the midst of congratulating myself on a good job packing, realized I have no cufflinks and two French cuffed shirts. #
• Perfect Strangers: Nothing's Gonna Stop Me Now
  http://t.co/6caPYJCr cc: @swartycomedy #
• Morning bedhead approaching Gene Wilder /Willy Wonka levels. #
• Birthday tshirt from my sister in law. Your argument is invalid. #fb http://t.co/SnDgOToy #

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• Cavalcade of Leftovers 2012. #
• Day ain't over, yet. http://t.co/dT7iLrwC #
• Would you like to know what the dumbest thing in the world is? Driving to Target to buy light bulbs and leaving your wallet at home. #fb #
• Speaking at a CLE. I am so awful at this, all I want to do is crawl under a rock and die. #
• And the obvious occurs to me this am: the way to prevent reading from materials is not to give 'em such detailed materials to begin with. #
• Too late. #
• Attn @ColsRecPark, currently impossible to park @ Tuttle Rec Center for classes etc in evening; baseball is overflowing. Please address. #
• Moral victory. http://t.co/rbz50gs1 #
• Hoping this is just the House in full-on WTF mode, again. | CISPA Got Worse, & Then Passed On Rushed Vote http://t.co/W1XPrych via @Techdirt #
• Lunch over, now MOAR EDITING #redpenofDOOM #
• I just got a $3 credit for movies and TV shows @amazonvideo. Click http://t.co/8e7OWZX6 to get yours. #get3 #
• Surgery. http://t.co/CrIBvlBm #
• Well, that was an utterly frustrating experience. Wii surgery… unsuccessful. #
• My kid turned into Spider-Man, apparently. #fb http://t.co/VnBo8McQ #

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• SO TRUE. RT @ezraklein: MS Word is fax of early 21st century: cumbersome, inefficient, a relic of obsolete technology. http://t.co/gtJR37lg #
• Money where my mouth is time: taking Nora to this birthday party today at Audubon Center via the bike trail. #fb #
• Nice of my phone to alert me to the Franklin county wind advisory after the 50 minute bike ride. #whoops #fb #
• After a rest at Audubon Center, have concluded that someone replaced my comfy bike seat with one lined with rocks and barbed wire. #ow #
• Butterfly in flight. http://t.co/YXB2V1qn #
• My city, today. #columbus http://t.co/MoHsfz1x #
• Procrastinated taxes, and now I'm staring at a surprisingly unfortunate result. DISLIKE. #
• Once again, the city of Townsville is saved, thanks to INFO MISSING WHEN YOU DID THE WORK THE FIRST TIME AND WOULD HAVE MADE A DIFFERENCE #
• The @wilco show @ #LCPavilion for 8/4 still isn't on the show list @ http://t.co/59rusGvL. Someone *has* told the band they're playing, yes? #
• My wife just quoted — appropriately — from HUNT FOR RED OCTOBER, in Sean Connery's voice. I think I'm in love. #
• OMG YES PLEASE RT @GFRobot: Bill & Ted 3 May Include The Return Of The Grim Reaper http://t.co/6VjOlrA0 #
• You might be a king or just a street sweeper, but sooner or later you dance with the Reaper. #
• Finished with John Henry Days, by Colson Whitehead http://t.co/a2bfUaTc #
• At @wobbrewerydist to see a pal play acoustic. On a school night, no less! #
• In case anyone cares, a) CONTACT is on AMC right now, and b) it is one of my very favorite movies. #
• Which probably makes me a rank sentimentalist, but who cares. Genuine emotion in that flick, over Z's previous film which must not be named. #
• Looks like my son has moved into writing material for @SwartyComedy: "What kind of pests live on the moon? Lunar ticks." #baDUMbum #
• Water, flowing backwards. Brain is broken. http://t.co/xr7DbZYJ via @jdickerson #
• Oh, so that was an *entire* bottle of @brosdrakemead that we finished off over dinner? Whoops. #
• Every time I walk past this, I have to remind myself that it's an egg, not a duck on the toilet. http://t.co/atIrL1J1 #
• Can now safely cross "feel the seat of my pants unexpectedly rip" off of my bucket list. #fb #thesejeansaredeadtomenow #
• Cards. http://t.co/j2bJvEAf #
• feeling unexpected remorse that I didn't head down to Lost Weekend or something for RSD. Like I missed out on something. #

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• The Easter bunny always leaves the cleverest jelly bean trails. 🙂 http://t.co/k5S5qWLg #
• That guy was EVERYWHERE. http://t.co/xKA5TBar #
• Tix purchased for @NelsonvilleFest! #
• effort to send email to my coach pitch coaches stalled when I realized that I missed an entire coach and had the teams all wrong SONOFAB– #
• How you know you've watched too much kids' TV: must suppress urge to sing "the phone… the phone is RINGing" at the office. #wonderpets #fb #
• Just explained the setup in CASABLANCA to the kids. Goddamn, this is a great movie. #
• Wet goalie. http://t.co/aQ0hl4QW #
• Grabbed, not jabbed, Jesus, autocorrect. #
• In case you were wondering, the pork tenderloin sandwich at Tee Jaye's is not the same thing as a Jackson County veal. #themoreyouknow #fb #

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• fantasssssssssssssy drafffffffffft. @gdwiz keeps cherry-picking my selections. #
• also, it's nights like these that convince me I have no business in a fantasy baseball pool. #
• Hearing abt tornadoes in DFW area, I text @dahlbes1 to make sure she didn't go all Dorothy Gale. Fine, but in stairwell @ work, doors locked #
• Giving Tweetdeck another try. #
• Gave up. Inability to scroll to see all tweets + constant refresh = everything slides past me while reading. Bye, Tweetdeck. #
• I think we can all agree that sending your milk crashing into my eggs while I'm still bagging groceries is Not Very Nice GOOD DAY TO YOU SIR #
• “September Gurls” by Big Star is my new jam. ♫ http://t.co/FySYvwee #
• It is possible that I am spending this evening listening to Randy Newman's soundtrack to THE NATURAL. #takemeouttotheballgame #fb #
• Oh apparently that's the end of my laptop battery. #whoops #
• MONTEREYS COAST. #
• Such a ham. http://t.co/2EiSPRN3 #
• Family get togethers, night 1: stay up past a reasonable hour arguing politics over which you will never agree. #everytime #
• Dye job assembly line. http://t.co/obY0zPdd #
• Brats on the grill; baseball in the air. I love spring. http://t.co/AeYxlYZm #
• Play ball! (@ Huntington Park w/ 18 others) [pic]: http://t.co/1CWTP04S #
• First blood to the @CLBClippers! #
• LAPORTA! Three run HR!! #
• Carlin solo homer makes it 6-0 @CLBClippers. Waiting for the Bats to make this a game. #
• Credit where credit's due, that was a hell of a catch from Louisville's left fielder. #

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• ZOMG home. #fb #
• My inability to open a single-serving cup of CoffeeMate without spilling it all over the counter is becoming a workplace liability. #fb #
• My brain just produced the most horrible "what if the world just… FELL?" thought and now I need brainbleach. cc @gdwiz @peej_jones @robcwv #
• Which is bigger, the entire internet, or the entire internet as pinned at Pinterest? #micdrop #crickets #crickets @Peej_Jones @gdwiz @robcwv #
• Anyone else turn to go up stairs too quickly and almost topple over backwards?… Just me, then? #klutz #fb #
• Today's food epiphany: if there's guacamole on it, chances are high that I will order it. #
• Happy birthday, @twixlen! #
• Mercenary confession time: I am actively rooting against the Bucks this weekend. They lose, I win $ in the office pool. #iflouisvillewinstoo #
• This place is becoming a victim of its own success. Coffee tasting at @NorthMarket is waaaaay too packed. 🙁 #

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• Arrived and checked in. Commence to start super especial fun time 3000 go! (@ Disney's Beach Club Resort w/ 6 others) http://t.co/QuAnkE0Y #
• After all. (@ It's A Small World w/ 3 others) http://t.co/bfX3vSNb #
• GREETINGS STARFIGHTER http://t.co/At5Nalbx | http://t.co/750lUgsD #
• On our way to Hollywood Studios sans @Peej_Jones, who is apparently never going to wake up. http://t.co/gzmw4nKr #
• No jedi academy for Carl. Had to sign up in the early ayem, and we didn't get here until 11:15. Settled for build yer own lightsabers. #fb #
• Closed out last night at Hollywood Studios backlot. Had the run of the place for 3 hrs – Star Tours & Toy Story incl. http://t.co/NjjmZNXp #
• Doing some volunteer sorcery. Carl is pretty jazzed. (@ Sorcerers Of The Magic Kingdom) [pic]: http://t.co/PF4H7Fyr #
• Birthday girl has been hugged by Daisy, Pluto, and Pinnochio so far, and we've only been here thirty minutes. #
• Just, y'know, getting ready to have dinner with Cinderella. (@ Cinderella's Royal Table w/ @peej_jones) [pic]: http://t.co/eJYMENRy #
• Bus back to hotel to put the bday cake in the fridge(!) then BACK to Magic Kingdom for our final evening. Happy bday Nora and @Peej_Jones. #
• Hustled to get this back to the hotel so I could get back to the park… But so far no bus. 🙁 #
• Conventions are a lot less run-aroundy when a) you don't have elementary school kids with you and b) more alcohol is involved. #
• So. Many. Scooters. #
• CATS CATS CATS #cats #
• Bobcats!!! DO YOU BELIEVE IT!!! #
• Damn. #fb #
• Heartbroken but unbelievably proud. That was maybe one of the best basketball games I've ever seen. Way to go, Bobcats. @ohiou #ohiou #

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